[shadowed_girl]

A young boy, 17 years of age, from the major high school in my city/town shot himself in the head at 7:30 in the morning, Tuesday, May 2nd.

My whole town is effected. I cried, and I didnt even know the boy. He was a great guy from what Ive heard.. extremely smart, in a lot of honor society type things.. great kid, great friend. Ive got a story on what went wrong, the right story.. however, Im missing what we know is the key thing as the reasoning that only apparently the 6 friends he was with the night before know and they swore to him they would not tell. They did not give him permission to kill himself, they made him promise not to, but he did.. but apparently before he did this they promised not to tell.

They had to take in many counselors to the school of this boy this whole week. I had someone call me in tears, bawling.. because they knew this boy and its ripping them apart. There are so many tears, so many people who went to the viewing.. and while I missed it, I heard there was a TON of people there. 17 years old..

I just had to share this with someone and I figured this would be the best place.

Everyone, please remember this if you ever think about it. If you ever think no one will be effected, remember this. Im greatly effected by this and I didnt know the kid, but it saddens me deeply to know someone could kill themselves. No matter how much you think people wouldnt care, they would. Its sad that it took someone killing themselves to make an impact on my town, but it seems to be what it did take to get people to look at life more significantly.

Just.. never even think about suicide. I know life is tough, trust me, I know. Dont tell me that its not possible to make it through though.. because Ive seen people in the toughest situations and Ive been in tough situations. But thinking that killing yourself wont matter to anyone is crap! Thats apparently what this boy thought, and now his school is upset and in tears, along with the rest of the people in my town/city. Sure, no ALL of them, but a great great many are.

To add.. this boys 12 year old sister is the one who found him in the pool of blood with a bullet hole through the back of his head (he "swallowed the bullet".. shot through his mouth). His mother was following his sister down the stairs.. and she held her son, crying and talking to him.. because his body was still warm (they heard the shot, it was directly after). Him and his mom had just got out of a huge fight and he must have thought she didnt care..

Imagine your parents holding you talking to you! Imagine the pain of a sister finding her brother..
Im sorry this has no real importance but I needed to put it somewhere..
Im crying again now.. this kid was SEVENTEEN! Thats the age of many of my friends and to even think it could have been one of them, or to even think about all this kids' friends.. or that one girl at his school that loves him.. because I mean there had to be at least one, he was almost perfect aside from he got high occasionally.. I think maybe its hitting me kind of hard because of the age.. Because Ive thought about it before.. Because Ive talked so many people out of it.. And because Ive got close friends upset over him who have also thought about it before..

Suicide effects so many people. People you would have never imagined would have cared. I know there has been many many threads on this, but I just wanted to share a couple stories of it. Heres another one thats not as long.

October, 1998.. my aunt committed suicide by overdosing. They found her in her van in a parking lot when she was missing after work. Her MOTHER found her. She died on her husbands birthday and only a couple months before her son turned 7.

I miss my aunt. I barely knew her and Im just now beginning to miss her and wish she was here.. not just because I loved her despite the little I knew of her, but because I live right beside my cousin and I watch his dad date people.. and I cant imagine my cousin not having a mom. He has to think about her. He acts just like her in so many ways (my grandma tells me storries and I was 7 at the time of death, so I remember some). Im now 15, my cousin 14.. and the effects of her suicide are still with us today.. along with all the rest of my family.

If you think for a minute that your suicide will not be felt, or only felt by people for a short time.. you are wrong. Never even consider suicide. Ever. Its just not the answer and it will cause the shadow and pain of death on so many lives........

*Sniffle* I have other stories.. I know a few other suicide cases.. but I will not go there because they werent near as personal as these two seem to hit me..

I just had to share it somewhere.


EDIT:: Feel free to share stories of suicide(s) that have affected you..

[IIX]

I don't mean to offend
I just want to say that you should think of SOCIAL STATUS
And problems that people have with other people(s)
also,not everyone faces HARD TIMES

By the way,you look like you have a good life by the way you look.
I am just making a prediction based on your face.

Suicide sucks
But,sometimes,it is the only way for somethings.

[Barely Breathing]

Well from the sounds of it he was a popular guy.. probably why it effected the whole town.

also,not everyone faces HARD TIMES

Not true. We ALL go through hard times. Rich people, poor people, famous people, regular people, everybody..

By the way,you look like you have a good life by the way you look.
I am just making a prediction based on your face.

And you also can't judge a person like that.. she may look good ( ) but that doesn't mean she hasn't got any problems.

[Spoon]

Thaty story is terrible but theres something missing, it doesnt fit together y would somebody hu u described as almost perfect kill himself?? there must be something that u dont no about, i mean if i did kill myself which i would not i no alot of people wouldnt care and alot of people would be glad but it doesnt mean i do

also this is the thing about America ur gun laws are so ridiculas, it makes it soo easy for people 2 do what this kid did coz almost everybody has access to a gun, i mean everybody knows about the columbine disaster, 2 guys just helped them selves to a bunch of guns from "their grandfathers arsenal" i mean wtf?? thats y the gun crime and gun related deaths are around 4 times higher than any other country

[Barely Breathing]

It doesn't fit together? It makes perfect sense to me.. he might of been like that from the outside, but who knows what he was bottling up on the inside. Things really aren't as perfect as they look.

[Seb89]

Originally Posted by Barely Breathing

It doesn't fit together? It makes perfect sense to me.. he might of been like that from the outside, but who knows what he was bottling up on the inside. Things really aren't as perfect as they look.

Hence the tragedy.

A story like this also happened recently in our area. It wasn't a suicide, though, but a murder. It happened in a salon, the girl, who owned the place mader her early morning rounds, greeting the loyal customers they had. Then suddenly the girl's ex comes in, and shoots three people. The girl tried to escape, but she was also gunned down. Anyway, it was a twisted love triangle of sorts. Apparently the girl left the guy because the latter disrespected her family. It was really a sad story, and I extend my condolences to the girl's family. I mean, I live in a small, closely-knit community. This girl might have been the person sitting next to me at Mass the previous week, or the one I bumped into but never noticed, or even the one who honked her horn at me. Whatever the case may be, I hope she finds peace and that justice is meted out. Btw, the guy shot himself in the head after he had done his deed.

Suicides and murders are really unfortunate events. They remind us that our lives are precious and that we may lose them at the most unexpected times. I really hope that these people will finally be able to rest.

[saleri]

also this is the thing about America ur gun laws are so ridiculas, it makes it soo easy for people 2 do what this kid did coz almost everybody has access to a gun, i mean everybody knows about the columbine disaster, 2 guys just helped them selves to a bunch of guns from "their grandfathers arsenal" i mean wtf?? thats y the gun crime and gun related deaths are around 4 times higher than any other country

omg....does anyone else see how wrongly he has drawn a conclusion. I'm not saying your wrong, but you cannot derive this sort of thing from that event. You don't need anything about him, so what if he was socially perfect, if he was good boy and seemed 'perfect'. People who have alot are the ones who may comit suicide.

There are a million reasons for why he could have done what he did but drawing a conclusion like that from this case is totally unacceptable.

A while back I wanted to kill myself, i had evreything, freinds, family, a good education, i didn't know why, I just wanted to.

I personally think that kids who seem really "perfect" on the outside are the ones who have something really negative inside them.
I

[shadowed_girl]

Originally Posted by IIX

I don't mean to offend
I just want to say that you should think of SOCIAL STATUS
And problems that people have with other people(s)
also,not everyone faces HARD TIMES

By the way,you look like you have a good life by the way you look.
I am just making a prediction based on your face.

Suicide sucks
But,sometimes,it is the only way for somethings.

What the hell? This wasnt even about me and you so just jumped down MY THROAT. Its not the "only way".. ever. Its just not. There are like few cases (cancer) that its the best way but its not the ONLY WAY. Its just quitting.

I look like I have a good life.. well.. you're f*cking wrong. I really <b>dont</b> have a good life, but hey, I deal. Im not saying its the hardest **** ever but I dont have a good life.

And yes.. everyone DOES face hard times.

Now next time you reply, reply to my story or something instead of attacking me. I know you said you dont mean to offend.. but how can you say that stuff and NOT offend?

Originally Posted by drproctor

Thaty story is terrible but theres something missing, it doesnt fit together y would somebody hu u described as almost perfect kill himself?? there must be something that u dont no about, i mean if i did kill myself which i would not i no alot of people wouldnt care and alot of people would be glad but it doesnt mean i do

also this is the thing about America ur gun laws are so ridiculas, it makes it soo easy for people 2 do what this kid did coz almost everybody has access to a gun, i mean everybody knows about the columbine disaster, 2 guys just helped them selves to a bunch of guns from "their grandfathers arsenal" i mean wtf?? thats y the gun crime and gun related deaths are around 4 times higher than any other country

Yes, there is something only 6 of his friends whom he was with the night before know about. I know the story, I didnt share it.. but I dont know that one thing. It doesnt fit together, but that one thing that those people promised not to tell is the key thing and it has a huge importance in it because it is more than likely what caused the tragedy. There is more reasons behind it also, but that one is the main one and we cant figure out what it is.

As for the gun laws.. he could have done this just as easy by slitting his wrist or stabbing himself or eating rat poisoning. Our gun laws didnt lead to him shooting himself.. if he wanted to die, he was going to die. Thats really dumb to say stuff about our gun laws. Sure, maybe I dont agree with them.. but our gun laws actually come in handy sometimes too. Probably more often then they cause trouble. Besides, do you know how easy it would be to find a gun illegally? I know a BUNCH of people who have guns illegally.. it wouldnt be hard for him either since Im sure he knows at least a COUPLE connections.



Today was his burial.. I didnt go, as I didnt know him very well, and Im hurting quite badly.. But Im mourning with the rest of his family and friends anyways.. =(

[Spoon]

the thing i said earlier about the gun laws was just an oppertunity to say that really seemed appropriet

and saleri if u wanna stop being a moron for 15 seconds ud realise the bit u quoted was a statment not a conclusion

[saleri]

and saleri if u wanna stop being a moron for 15 seconds ud realise the bit u quoted was a statment not a conclusion

....which is what i thought you were going to say.

and i was going to reply....

As for the gun laws.. he could have done this just as easy by slitting his wrist or stabbing himself or eating rat poisoning. Our gun laws didnt lead to him shooting himself.. if he wanted to die, he was going to die.

I dunno, i thought it was just wasn't the right place to post nor that appropriate.

[shadowed_girl]

Originally Posted by drproctor

the thing i said earlier about the gun laws was just an oppertunity to say that really seemed appropriet

and saleri if u wanna stop being a moron for 15 seconds ud realise the bit u quoted was a statment not a conclusion

Im not trying to be rude here but you thought it was be appropriate to pretty much say that if the gun laws werent like this then the kid who killed himself never would have? Meanwhile, Im upset by the whole thing and dont need "gun laws" brought in.. that seems approriate? It was off topic & all but ok.. Im not even going to care.

I made this to talk about things of suicide (or even murder or just deaths) that have effected people.. not to have people tell me what is wrong with U.S. laws just because one of my stories involved a gun. The other was pills.. lets talk about how doctors prescribe too many pills? No.. I dont really want to.. but if you are going to talk about guns with it you might as well talk about the pills too.

Sorry. Im upset today. I hope Im not coming across as too *****y.

[amaya's daddy]

...that hit close to home. My best friend killed himself when he was 15. He shot himself, too, while I was at his house...I was the one who found him. That's haunted me day in and day out for the past four years that he's been dead. On the anniversary of his death (April 17) I drove to where he was buried (like I do every year, even though I live far away now) to pay my respects. There's not a day that goes by that I don't miss him and wish he were here. He was a great guy, more like a brother to me than anything. My community was ripped apart by his death, too. And I couldn't help but blame myself. I was his best friend..I should have done something. I was at his house, I heard the gunshot, if I had just followed him into his room, I could have stopped him..ehh I still beat myself up over that a lot.
And another thing, that's kind of relevant...I've attempted suicide twice, but the first time is the only one I really count. It was about a year after my best friend had died and everything was just piling up on me, so I went in my bathroom and took a bunch of pills. My sister found me and called 911, and that made me snap out of the suicidal thing...because I couldn't help wondering, What if my sister had waited just ten minutes? Then she would have found my body. And I didn't want to put her through that. Reading what happened to this guy...it's very sad. Because I've been in the mindset that he was in, and I've experienced losing a best friend to suicide...it's extremely unfortunate when things like this happen.

[shadowed_girl]

Originally Posted by amaya's daddy

...that hit close to home. My best friend killed himself when he was 15. He shot himself, too, while I was at his house...I was the one who found him. That's haunted me day in and day out for the past four years that he's been dead. On the anniversary of his death (April 17) I drove to where he was buried (like I do every year, even though I live far away now) to pay my respects. There's not a day that goes by that I don't miss him and wish he were here. He was a great guy, more like a brother to me than anything. My community was ripped apart by his death, too. And I couldn't help but blame myself. I was his best friend..I should have done something. I was at his house, I heard the gunshot, if I had just followed him into his room, I could have stopped him..ehh I still beat myself up over that a lot.
And another thing, that's kind of relevant...I've attempted suicide twice, but the first time is the only one I really count. It was about a year after my best friend had died and everything was just piling up on me, so I went in my bathroom and took a bunch of pills. My sister found me and called 911, and that made me snap out of the suicidal thing...because I couldn't help wondering, What if my sister had waited just ten minutes? Then she would have found my body. And I didn't want to put her through that. Reading what happened to this guy...it's very sad. Because I've been in the mindset that he was in, and I've experienced losing a best friend to suicide...it's extremely unfortunate when things like this happen.

To the attempts.. I think maybe thats also why it kind of brings it to my heart, as I was a self harmer, and I know many.. Ive thought about suicide, and Ive come extremely close to doing so. Ive slit my wrists once with intent of killing myself.. but ended up making it clot so I didnt. Ive had the knife to my throat when someone called and wanted to talk.. because they heard some things were going on. I just have to sit and think about it now.. because what if I had done it? Or what if one of my friends who had said so many times they hated life had done it? These kid was 17.. thats my boyfriends age.. what if it was him? Or what if he found out I did it? What about the girl who loved this kid..? I have so many feelings to this.. yet it wasnt even someone I knew.

I cant even begin to imagine finding my friend dead as you did and continuing on.. You seem great now.. and you know, you shouldnt have and still shouldnt beat yourself up over it because its not your fault. Who is to say you would have stopped him had you followed him? He may have done it anyways, or worse yet, shot you in the process (not to kill you just to get you to back off) and then killed himself.. A suicide is rarely the fault of anyone but the person because it *usually* takes events piling up. Im sorry that you had to and still have to go through that memory =( Thats terrible..

[amaya's daddy]

yeah..it is terrible..and it's taken me a long time to get to be somewhat ok about it..literally, after it happened, I locked myself up in my room and didn't talk to anyone for days and weeks. His death wasn't the only thing I was going through at the time, and I just couldn't deal with any of it.
The thing is, though, when I went over his house, he was acting strange. And I noticed it, and I wondered about it, and he was saying suicidal things. His parents weren't home so I told myself that as soon as they got home, I'd talk to them about it, tell them my thoughts...I didn't know that it would be too late. I heard the gunshot and I thought it came from outside or something, but then I realized that if that was true, Tim would have come to see what was going on, and he didn't...so that's when I went in his room and found him. I spoke at his funeral because his parents asked me to and I know he would have wanted me to, but it was the hardest thing I've ever done. Thank god for my friends that helped me through that, and then four months later, Amaya was born
I got "RIP TIM" tattooed on my arm when I turned 17.
But it's natural to blame yourself, that's my point. Every time someone kills themself, or even dies, someone blames themself. That's why it's so tragic when someone does kill themself, because they think no one will care, but they don't even realize how MUCH everyone will care...

[shadowed_girl]

Originally Posted by amaya's daddy

yeah..it is terrible..and it's taken me a long time to get to be somewhat ok about it..literally, after it happened, I locked myself up in my room and didn't talk to anyone for days and weeks. His death wasn't the only thing I was going through at the time, and I just couldn't deal with any of it.
The thing is, though, when I went over his house, he was acting strange. And I noticed it, and I wondered about it, and he was saying suicidal things. His parents weren't home so I told myself that as soon as they got home, I'd talk to them about it, tell them my thoughts...I didn't know that it would be too late. I heard the gunshot and I thought it came from outside or something, but then I realized that if that was true, Tim would have come to see what was going on, and he didn't...so that's when I went in his room and found him. I spoke at his funeral because his parents asked me to and I know he would have wanted me to, but it was the hardest thing I've ever done. Thank god for my friends that helped me through that, and then four months later, Amaya was born
I got "RIP TIM" tattooed on my arm when I turned 17.
But it's natural to blame yourself, that's my point. Every time someone kills themself, or even dies, someone blames themself. That's why it's so tragic when someone does kill themself, because they think no one will care, but they don't even realize how MUCH everyone will care...

It is natural.. and this girl that I talked to last night.. she was blaming herself, even though she wasnt even around him when some things happened.. and she was crying and I was just sitting there and tears just gently fell down because I knew how many people were doing the same thing over him at that point.. how many lives he had touched.. and how it is devastating so many people. We are so scared at this point that more people might do the same thing.. because suicide can sometimes be a chain. But we are hoping that it will be more of a people realising life is precious than anything.. which is what its made me do.

Its terrible when people kill themselves.. and its really sad.. my best friend had an uncle who did it, and I had someone shoot himself in one of the apartments my family owns (that was.. interesting.. as we had to clean out all of his stuff.... it was terrible). I dont know that I could get up and speak about a death of a friend if it happened to me, so I definitely have to say that you have balls and were obviously a great friend.

You are just a great person. I hate you =P