[Fallen_Angel]

I can't upload a .rtf, so I'll just paste what's been happening in a post.

If you're going to say any of this is MY fault, then **** don't bother posting.



On Tuesday, many things happened to me at once. In geography, Hussein and Nayma were sitting in front of me. Laurie was near the back, James was at the front. Our geography teacher told Laurie off and moved him to the front row, where Hussein and Nayma were. Every time I talked to Hussein, Nayma would turn round and I didn’t like the way she was looking at me. She was being nosy and was glaring at me every time I wanted to talk to him.
I didn’t say or do anything to Laurie or James, nor did I look at them once, but when I heard James say the phrase “Just bare cock her one Laurie, just bare cock her” I looked up and both James and Laurie were glaring at me and Laurie started laughing.
(Still Tuesday) At lunchtime Rebecca and Jamilla were on the other side, sitting on a bench, with Amber and Susannah. I sat on another bench, by myself. Tanya and Nayma came by, and as Tanya tried to talk to me and ask me “Why are you by yourself?” Nayma gave me a bad look, and pulled Tanya away to stop her from coming to me.

Hussein was in the same area as me, and he was standing with Naumann, Oliver, Toby, Omar and Alex. Omar and Naumann kept trying to catch my eye. I looked back at them but I didn’t say anything or showed them that I was annoyed. I called Hussein to ask him why they were doing that, and he said they were trying to piss me off. Afterwards he also told me that all of them started *****ing about me, and that he (Hussein) stuck up for me and told them I’m his friend. They stopped when he said that.

When the buzzer went for tutor, I sat down, and Rebecca was sitting next to me. James and Moe H were behind us. This is how we sit in tutor every day. There are two spaces next to me. On Monday, Lauren sat to the edge near the wall, and Chloe next to me (filling in the 2 spaces). Tuesday, though, Chloe had a problem with sitting in this position this time. They were standing up, not sitting down yet, and Lauren asked Chloe why she didn’t want to sit there. When Lauren asked her why, Chloe completely turned her back on me, and started whispering, covering part of her mouth with her blazer. Lauren started staring at me a few seconds after Chloe started speaking to me, and she kept on doing so until she sat down. Chloe and Lauren sat where Lauren wanted to sit, but Chloe didn’t talk to me at all and had her back turned, talking to James and Moe. I immediately knew (or thought, as you could say) that it was probably because of me why Chloe didn’t want to sit next to me. I covered my face and burst into tears because of that, as so many things happened throughout the day and I couldn’t take it any more. I heard Lauren say “Why is she crying?”
When I went outside tutor and waited for Hussein to come, Lauren was standing next to me, waiting for Chloe. She asked me “Whassa matter Lara?” I mumbled “Nothing.” Although I knew I should have told her, at the time I didn’t think telling her would make any difference. As Laurie came out, he said my name in a stupid way, going “Laa-raaaa” and he looked at me with a frown on his face.


Wednesday in geography, Lauren repeated what happened in tutor the day before very loudly to Elena and Rosy. I looked at all four of them (Chloe was next to Lauren) and they all gave me dirty looks and burst out laughing, and they just kept on laughing and laughing. I heard Lauren say my name, and the loudest thing that I heard, as if it was the punch line for a joke, was “…and THEN she started crying!” That’s when they laughed for ages. Moe H though stuck up for me, though, God knows why, and said “You’re all bullies, leave her alone.”
At the field, during the sports competition, I told this to Joe and Hussein. After I finish, Joe goes “Yeah and Aiyah was being horrible as well.”
I had no idea about this, so I reply “What?”
Joe says, “Oh, didn’t you see? As Lauren and all them were all laughing, Aiyah passes by and imitates you crying, she was rubbing her eyes and had a big frown on her face.”
Hussein also tells me that one time when my absence note fell out of the register, Jade picked it up and read it, and so did Aiyah. Then Aiyah keeps on going “What does abdominal mean?” because the note had mentioned I had ‘abdominal pains’.
This information from Joe B and Hussein really surprised me, as I’ve been friendly with Aiyah and Jade for a long while, and I didn’t think they’d be so two-faced. 

Today, (Thursday) period 1, PE, James hits me very hard twice with a rounders bat. At first on my right arm, then really hard on my back. I turned around and saw Chloe having a mobile phone (it belonged to Jeton) recording all this, and then I run to the wall behind the tree and just burst out crying. I talk to Hussein and Jeton about this, then Aarti and Sara say that they were actually recording what Jeton was doing (he was standing very near to me at the time.) Jeton then tells me it’s the truth. But I still got angry as we’re not even supposed to use damn mobiles anyway. Our PE teacher, Mr Kay, never tells anyone off and he’s not very strict at all. I was even shouting and swearing and only when I was at breaking point did he tell Chloe to put the phone away.

At the end of period 2 (R.E), I notice that my back muscles were very weak and in pain, so I go to medical. Miss Bischoff comes in, and Rebecca suggests that I tell her what James did, so I told her, even though at first I didn’t really want to. I ended up missing the whole of Maths because my back was so weak, and I had to have a warm compress on it. I didn’t really like re-telling the story, as there were Year 9’s (Lisa, James Hayes, James Nawka) asking me what happened. I go, “I got hit with a rounders bat” they say “By who?” Then I say “Macca” as everyone knows James McCluskey by that nickname.

After I come to you at lunchtime, in tutor James told Jeton “She told Miss Bischoff, and I have to apologise.” Jeton said “Just apologise then man.” James said sorry, and then as you already know, I mumbled “He doesn’t mean it.” Rebecca became a right ***** (sorry, but she can’t be trusted, she’s done this so many times to me before), and turned around and loudly said in a rude way “She said you don’t mean it!” James got pissed off then, and that was the last thing I wanted, as soon afterwards I felt better that he apologised, whether he meant it or not. I asked Rebecca “Why did you say that?”

And then she shouts loudly, getting angry for no damned reason, “Because you always say things and you keep it to your self and you didn’t say it to him and you say things but you don’t tell people and I’m bloody getting sick of it!” How would you like it if that happened to you? Surely you can see that from my point of view, surely. There was no need for that. Moe H found this funny, he goes “My God, look at Rebecca, hear what she’s saying!”

And then, straight after this Amal stuck up for Rebecca, I forgot what her exact words were, but she was on Rebecca’s side. I was getting so bloody angry and I was like “Flipping hell.” I mean, why was Amal getting involved? IT’S GOT NOTHING TO DO WITH HER. At least Hussein stuck up for me.

James says to Lauren “She told Miss Bischoff I hit her with a rounders bat.”
I looked at Lauren, she was laughing, then she turned round quickly as soon as she noticed I saw. Chloe was looking at me too, I sighed and frowned at her and she shouts loudly “Lara, WHY ARE YOU GIVING ME A DIRTY LOOK?” Then as the buzzer goes, she and everyone else gets up and they all look at me and start whispering and Chloe goes and tells everyone what I did, and I heard Sara loudly say “Just give her a dirty look back!”

I swear, if nothing gets better after this, I’m not coming to school anymore, I couldn’t care less about my education if that’s the way it’s going to be from now on.


^ This is what has been given to my head of year, Mr Dean.

Also, after what happened to my back yesterday, I can hardly move my legs now.

[Barely Breathing]

...Is it compulsory for your school to have people take drug tests? Well, it damn should be if it isn't. That, or they need to do a better job..

Some people.. look don't worry about them, they sound like immature little **** heads to me. And they probably are. But why were the acting that way towards you in the first place? And why did this guy hit you with a freaking bat? I don't get these people..

[Fallen_Angel]

They all do it for fun, cause I don't talk much and I'm one of the more sensitive people. Otherwise, I can't think of anything else. I haven't done anything to any of them.

And James, well he hit me on purpose because he wanted to. He didn't have any other reason. He doesn't care.

...Is it compulsory for your school to have people take drug tests? Well, it damn should be if it isn't. That, or they need to do a better job..

I don't think so, no teacher has said anything about drug tests and we haven't been given any information.
But you're right, it should be, I know of some boys and girls that smoke cigarettes or weed in the toilets...

And they definitely ARE immature, so many people tell me I'm much more mature than anyone else in my class.

I don't get them either.

[Barely Breathing]

Was joking about the drug test thing because it's just a BIT random for them to just start taking the piss out of you like that. And not the best thing to do with all that free time they've got on their hands.

The only way to shake away people like that would be to ignore them. Fight back, then they'll try make it worser for you. But, if you put on an attitude that you don't give a rats arse about what they say you'll do fine. However, if that guy hurts you, then I'd report him to your school and get him expelled. Trying to avoid him would be a good idea..

Hope your back get's better too.

[Fallen_Angel]

Yeah I hope so too. Thanks Michael.

It's a bit hard to avoid James, seeing as he's in my tutor group, making him be in 7 of my classes...

Was joking about the drug test thing because it's just a BIT random for them to just start taking the piss out of you like that.

Oh, lol.

I laughed and my STOMACH hurt. Jeez, maybe my back really has gone that bad. I'm ****ing scared now. I'm gonna get it checked on Monday at the hospital, if things don't get any better.

[Eugenia]

Yes, I agree with him, the best way is to ignore them. You shouldn't pay much attention in them, look at them as inferior & immature children who have too much time on their hands. You know, laughing at someone and making fun of them with every chance shows not coolness but stupidness. I know it seems hard to just ignore BUT you should at least try not to show your feelings so easily. You may be sensitive but try to hold them inside. Don't let them feel the satisfaction of making you cry. Also, you should talk to them sarcastivally & show that you no longer give a **** about what they're saying. =)

[Fallen_Angel]

Also, you should talk to them sarcastivally & show that you no longer give a **** about what they're saying. =)

That's what my friend Hussein has been telling me. But I find it very, very hard. I'm just not one of those people to easily let things get out of my mind, I just don't know how to do it.

[Spoon]

hmm sounds to me jike u have some attention seekers on ur back, i wouldnt worry about them, drop them out of your life, dont let them know that u care, make it obvious u couldnt give a **** and know if they realise that they no longer bother u, they will probably turn on each other. there really not worth u leaving school or anything, there just a bunch of immature *****es, trust me when they get out of school its gonna be them that suffer, their gonna go to an A-level collage and face some serious problems coz they'll pick on the wrong person who will deal with it properly

as for your back, well tbh i think ur being a bit of a hypocondriac, friend of mine landed badly on a trmpolien a few weeks ago and was screaming and shouting that he couldnt feel his legs, turned out he's sprained his ankle. u have to have some pretty serious trama to the spinal colmn or head for u to not be ab le to move your legs!!! but get it checked out and make sure u dont make a bif deal of it to ur *****y people, it will only show that they are beating you

[Fallen_Angel]

I'm going to the hospital to get it checked out tomorrow, although my legs are better now. It's always best to be safe than sorry.

James has been suspended for a week. Don't think it will do much good, but there ya go.

Thanks Chris.

[Spoon]

like i said make it obvbious u don't care about them, turn them into flys that u can just bat away eventuly they will leave u alone

[Fallen_Angel]

Meh, I'm taking a break off school for a while to rest. I went to the hospital today and the doctor said maybe I should just not do PE and Games for the next few weeks. That's basically until the end of term.

[Oriana]

What a bunch of immature little pricks....oh man I would so smack em one, I was getting angry just reading that. I think its good you wrote that to your pricipal, its not like i can ignore the wanks exactly because sounds like it wouldnt do much good. Hopefully he puts them all in their place, he better bloody well do so.

Until then I wish you the best of luck, do your best, your lucky to have a good friend like Hussein. But yeah best wishes

[Fallen_Angel]

Thank you Oriana You little sweetie-pie!

Well, I'm going to be moving tutor group, to 9M. It's probably the only place where people won't bother me, every other tutor group has at least one person who's a real arsehole.

The thing is, I don't have anyone very close there, so Hussein wants to move with me, cause he's got another close friend, Jamie, there. And he also hates our tutor group anyway.

I hope Mr Dean will move Hussein too. I'll feel much more confident and happier.

I'm going back to school next week.

[tehfincheh]

Ahh **** them. I hate immature little dildos like that.

Just reading through your post, it's horrible because i remember that kind of stuff going on all the time at my old school and it's really pretty pathetic.

It's not much of a help, but kids do actually grow up so try to put it to the back of your mind. It's not always easy to ignore something like that, because your whole senses are adjusted to what's going on around you. I remember how it feels to have a couple of lippy idiots on my back, and looking back on things, i regret even sparing them the time of day.

Ignoring isn't always the best idea, since it'll encourage them to continue with a free target. But if you show them that you've noticed what they're up to and tell them shortly and sweetly that you've got better things to deal with, at least they'll begin to realise that you're not going to react to them.

They're looking for a reaction to bring some kind of meaning to their pointless ways, and it's sad that others have to suffer for it.

[Kirstyyy]

Tbh, they will grow out of it, you're in year 9 yeah? Things get much better in year 10 & 11, and if they don't I'll eat my arm.